It takes a man to make a better woman

Men were created with women not to compete with each other.

The National Women's Month is celebrated every March along with the worldwide observance of the International Women's Day. Various publications, news programs, and social media posts commemorate this by narrating and describing how women of today have made their mark in various fields throughout the world. However, while there have been significant milestones in as far as the promotion of women empowerment across societies is concerned, certain stereotypes and misconceptions still exist in the consciousness of a lot of people, particularly of men.

If you look around and try to ask a lot of men to describe what they want in a future partner, most would tell you in a heartbeat that they like someone simple, sweet, caring, and loving. Most men would gravitate less towards a strong and outspoken woman and jump into the conclusion that such a woman is not "girlfriend material." When you dig deeper into their preferences, it might show that some men would like a woman they can easily control. There are also others who will attempt to mold a woman into the kind of future partner that they want her to be. The result would be that a man's desire to be in a relationship with a woman may be tainted or perverted by selfish interests.

Significant leaps have been achieved by women in their respective professions. However, a lot of women may still feel hindered from achieving their full potential in their careers due to their male counterpart's egos.

It is sad to hear stories of some wives forced to give up their life-long dreams in order to save their husbands of their self-made standards of embarrassment. It remains a reality in Philippine society that some husbands refuse to accept the fact that their wives are advancing professionally and financially at a faster rate. It also doesn’t help that peer groups add fuel to the fire by insisting that husbands become less of a man if their wives earn more than they do.

As a consequence, a lot of husbands may either try to pull their partners down or wallow in self-pity to the point that it affects the situation of their marriage and family altogether. This then lead to the downfall of relationships, marriages and families.

I think it’s high time that we put our biases and stereotypes aside and start thinking of life beyond the confines of our egos. I also think that men in general should stop putting their egos as a topmost priority if they intend to enter or maintain a relationship. This is not to say that we have to throw away our egos. We just have to realize that there are far more important things than our egos if we want to build relationships.

In as much as we, men, want our individualism to be respected, we also have to give women the freedom to exercise their own levels of individualism. Women are capable of doing what men can do and we have to accept that this is a reality that happens in many parts of the world.

Accepting this reality does not make us less of a man or even less of a human being. It only goes to show that we are secure with our own identities and that we are confident enough in the uniqueness and identity that we possess as men. After all, men and women are co-equal human beings and there is no better or greater gender.

Men were created with women not to compete with each other. Men were created with women because they complement each other well. But complementation does not mean dependence. Women were made to stand out and make their own mark. As men with mature disposition and outlook in life, we should allow women to do so without biases and without our egos getting in the way. There is also truth to the saying, “Behind a successful woman is a true enough man.”

Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of TheLOBBYiST.
About the Author
Mr. Aaron Benedict De Leon is currently a Business Development Practitioner in a private consulting firm. He has more than six years of professional experience in leading and managing political and non-government organizations, specializing in organizational management, policy development and program management. He has had stints with notable political/socio-civic organizations, serving in various capacities as: Secretary-General of the Centrist Democratic Party of the Philippines (CDP) [2013-2015], Founding Chairperson of the Centrist Democratic Youth Association of the Philippines (CDYAP) [2012-2014], Philippine Representative to the International Young Democrat Union (IYDU) [2011-2012], Chairperson of the Christian Democratic Youth [2011-2012], Secretary-General of YOUTH Philippines [2010-2011], and Spokesperson/Communications Director of the GT2010 Gilbert Teodoro Presidential Campaign [2009-2010].
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